生前ハヤット神父が寄稿されたお話しを英語と日本語で毎月お届けします。

ハヤット神父
ハヤット神父

 

To Become An Adult

smile of the sun - 太陽の微笑みイメージ

When does a child become an adult? In the eyes of the law, this occurs at the age of 20 in Japan. Psychologically speaking, however, a child becomes an adult only when he stops taking and begins to give. Then he is an adult. He is ready to take a position of responsibility in society.

It is not difficult to find examples of young people who are legally adults, but who remain psychologically immature.

There are many young people who are working, but they nevertheless expect their parents to continue taking care of them. They use their own income for themselves. They may be in their late 20s, but their attitude toward life remains that of children. They prefers to take rather than give.

This emotional immaturity can ruin a marriage faster than anything else. The essence of love, whether in marriage or friendship, consists in giving oneself to the person loved. But the immature person only knows how to receive. Where happiness is not given neither can it be received. So immature people cannot love each other, and be happy. Young men and women should become adults before they get married, not after. To learn how to give to others is very important. To be happy, they must change from receivers to givers.